Can't Protect The Stupid From Themselves

But that doesn't mean the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission isn't trying!

"FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
December 19, 2011
Release #12-058

E&B Giftware Agrees to $550,000 Civil Penalty for Failing to Report Defective Fitness Balls

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) announced today that it has reached a settlement with E&B Giftware LLC (E&B), of Yonkers, N.Y., resolving CPSC staff allegations that E&B failed to report a defect with its fitness balls. In settling this matter, E&B has agreed to pay a civil penalty in the amount of $550,000. The settlement agreement has been provisionally accepted by the Commission.

CPSC staff alleged that E&B’s subsidiary, EB Brands, LLC (EB Brands), knew of 25 incidents related to the defective balls as early as 2007, but failed to immediately inform the Commission as required by federal law. Some of these incidents led to consumers being injured. By October 2008, when EB Brands reported to the Commission, EB Brands knew of at least 44 incidents involving the fitness balls.

EB Brands sold three million of the fitness balls from May 2000 through February 2009. They were recalled in April 2009.

At that time, there were 47 reports of the fitness balls unexpectedly bursting when overinflated by consumers, resulting in injuries, including a fracture and bruises.

Federal law requires manufacturers, distributors and retailers to report to CPSC immediately (within 24 hours) after obtaining information reasonably supporting the conclusion that a product contains a defect which could create a substantial product hazard, creates an unreasonable risk of serious injury or death, or fails to comply with any consumer product safety rule or any other rule, regulation, standard or ban enforced by CPSC.

In agreeing to the settlement, E&B denies CPSC staff allegations that it knowingly violated the law.

Read The Directions?
I DON'T NEED NO STINKING DIRECTIONS!

What's next?
Tires, footballs, basketballs, beach balls, balloons?How are STUPID people supposed to learn?



Proper Balloon Handling: Directions for dummies.

(1) Take a deep breath, inhale.
(2) Place balloon opening to the lips and blow (do not inhale).
(3) Repeat this process till you feel lightheaded.
(4) Clasp balloon opening firmly with fingers.
(5) Tie balloon opening securely.DISCLAIMERS (CYA):
* Do not over inflate as this may cause balloon damage. * Do not smoke during this procedure. * Not recommended for children or adults with an IQ under 21. * Tie opening securely to prevent the balloon from becoming uncontrollable, possibly causing eye damage. * Keep away from heat or sharp objects. Balloons can explode loudly causing hearing loss. * Do not use balloon as a floatation device, or respirator for medical conditions. * Visit your doctor to see if your healthy enough before using. * Certain colors may not be appropriate for some who suffer color blindness. * Balloons cannot protect against sexually transmitted diseases, therefore should not be used as a substitute for condoms.